Back in July, Rave and I headed down to Virginia over the week of July 4th. The year before, I had won a drawing for two free plane tickets to anywhere in the continental USA, and a car rental for a week.
So we visited with her brother down in Newport News, and spent the week doing the Historic Triangle Ticket hitting Colonial Williamsburg, Jamestown, and Yorktown.
It was awesome. As a history nerd and reenactor, this was like going to Disneyland. Spending the 4th of July at the original Jamestown settlement site…. hell YES!
One of the many fantastic memories I took from this trip was in Yorktown.
While wandering through the cemetery grounds of the Grace Episcopal Church (Rave and I both love graveyards, especially really old ones) I happened upon an unassuming stone with no extra ornamentation other than a little American flag such as you see next to the resting place of our nation’s veterns, and small plaque that read:
“Signer of Declaration of Independence”
It was the resting spot of General Thomas Nelson Jr.
Chills went down my spine.
No crowds. No “hey, Famous Dead Guy Here!” signs. Rave and I were the only folks enjoying the peace of the cemetery, and we just happened upon the grave.
I stood there before the final resting place of this man. And I said “I’m sorry”.
At the time I thought it was for the reasons I’ve been bitching about lately. Looking at what these men fought for and how we, as a nation, have wiped our collective asses with it fills me with shame.
I’m ashamed of being a pessimistic defeatist.
I’m done with it. Erinyes is right. Fuck this shit, reload, pile the bodies, and carry on.
Still going to be doing a HELL of a lot of preparation for the coming times (that’s not pessimism, it’s just common fucking sense). Avoiding despair is a big part of that.
As a nation, I think at this point we NEED to be bitchslapped out of our comfort zone to wake people the fuck up. Leaning shit the hard way sucks, but at least it’s learning.
I am an agnostic, but if there is an afterlife I hope to shake General Nelson’s hand, look him in the eye, and say “I did what I could to protect what you gave us, sir.” without shame.